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Strange Requests

Never in my life have I been faced with so many do's and don'ts than right now as I carry this tiny baby in my belly. No cold cuts, no sushi, no ibuprofen...you all know how it is! Anyhow, I know how strict I am trying to be with my lifestyle now that I am pregnant, so I tried to imagine what I would require if I were an IP looking to trust someone with the wellfare of my unborn child. Oh man, I could be really strict and picky with my requirements if I thought hard enough about it!

I am wondering what some of the strange requirements IPs have asked of SMs, contractually. Maybe you are an SM and have experienced a strange but doable request. Maybe you are an IP and know that you are asking your SM to do something that is a little uncommon, but important to you/your family.

This discussion is not meant to be negative. Instead, I think it could be a good opportunity to normalize that each surrogacy arrangement is different, and often for good reason.

Can't wait to hear what you have to share!

Ivory

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Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Delila on March 8, 2010 at 8:04pm: why no cold cuts? what's the reasoning behind that. Sushi I can understand, because raw fish can be dangerous to an unborn child.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Sara K-W on March 8, 2010 at 8:07pm: I was told it was because of the number of Listeria outbreaks related to meat products in the last 2 years, but can't say 100% for sure....; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Ivory on March 8, 2010 at 8:09pm: Parasites or something like that...but in my thinking a parasite could be anywhere. And as for the sushi, Japanese women eat it all the time during their pregnancies (from what I read), and everything turns out ok...I think it is an American hang-up. Rules, Rules, Rules! lol!; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Melissa Mae Moore on March 18, 2010 at 11:06pm: i do know that sushi in america isnt raw... lol but i dont really like it.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Christina Hawkins on March 8, 2010 at 8:10pm: I've heard its bc theres sometime of bacteria that grows on the fresh meat after its cut ?; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Jenn on March 8, 2010 at 8:14pm: Ugh, now I don't want to eat cold cuts and I'm not even preggers ;); ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Melissa Mae Moore on March 18, 2010 at 11:06pm: lol agreed; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Sara K-W on March 8, 2010 at 8:14pm: I never really had my IP's ask me for anything "unusual" diet-wise. Just the typical foods to avoid that all doctors recommend. Avoid fish with Mercury, no sushi, no unpasturized cheeses, alcohol (obviously) and drugs not prescribed by a doctor. I don't have any real restrictions in my contract, but now that we are 20 weeks along, IM has started to make requests of things for me to avoid, but since it's not in my contract, I'm not obligated to avoid all the things she is requesting. She has asked me to not use Tylonol, which is the ONLY thing that I am allowed to use for pain...and to avoid massages, but my OB has recommended them for my back pain. and all of a sudden she wants me to avoid certain fruits like bananas, and pomergranites....but didn't tell me why.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Sara K-W on March 14, 2010 at 10:42am: ya, IM never gave me a reason for that, so I tried to look it up on my own... I found out that in VERY high quantities pomegranites can cause miscarriage or early labour, but for that you happen I'd have to eat about 10 whole pomegranites a day for a couple months to build up enough of it in my system....so not to worried about that since I get through maybe 5 the whole the time they are in season.

couldn't find anything about the bananas though other than to many can constipate you, but the potassium in them is good if you suffer from leg cramps, and since I'm not a big fan don't eat more than 2 a week if that.

there are so many different views on foods and pregnancy now, that really you just need to look at the info yourself and use your common sense.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by MICHELLE on March 18, 2010 at 4:42pm: As for massages as long as they do "maternity" massages it's safe. I had to call around to find a place that was certified and when I did my IFs sent me gift certificates so I went twice a month. My back felt so much better and it helps with circulation.
Persciptions= I only take meds that are perscribed by my OB. I went to urgent care and the Dr. gave me a perscription(he knew I was pregnant) I called my OB and he told me NOT to take it. Not enough testing at the time to know it was 100% safe. so always double check with your OB, don't trust just any Dr.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Melissa Mae Moore on March 18, 2010 at 11:07pm: thats weird bananas are very good for you and the baby...; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Jeniffer on March 8, 2010 at 9:15pm: My IP's are wonderful...they have not asked me not to do ANYTHING. They said I have been through this a couple of times with my own children and they trust that I know what I am doing. Also, as long as the doctor says it is ok, they are ok with it, whether it be meds, travel, or certain foods. I love my IP's!!! LOL; ▶ Reply to This