Surrogate Motherhood - The best surrogate mothers community
Have I Got A Deal For You!
As I was doing my weekly Internet browse of the surrogacy world, I ran across a surrogacy website/advertisement targeting women who have no physical limitations to prevent them from having babies. Specifically, it pointed out that it is a great idea to have a baby via surrogacy to avoid job-related complications, to eliminate the physical discomfort of pregnancy, and to maintain one's sleek figure. The words "Have we got a deal for you!" was even used. I was a little shocked to be honest. I don't have any problem with the idea of surrogacy in the least, but the wording and blunt commercialism of this site threw me off. Am I being too old fashioned that this site shocked me? I thought for a minute that I was being sold a ped-egg or a sham-wow or something...
So, two parts to this one:
-Was the line crossed?
-Is it okay for people to have a baby via surrogacy just to keep a trim figure and a busy career afloat?
(And thank you all for your patience with my Internet issues this week. I was reading your messages and posts, but was too impatient to actually post much using an iphone...my fingers were not cooperating!)
Ivory
So, two parts to this one:
-Was the line crossed?
-Is it okay for people to have a baby via surrogacy just to keep a trim figure and a busy career afloat?
(And thank you all for your patience with my Internet issues this week. I was reading your messages and posts, but was too impatient to actually post much using an iphone...my fingers were not cooperating!)
Ivory
Replies to This Discussion
-
Permalink Reply by Jenn on -
Would you mind sharing the site address? This ive got to see...
I thought this was frowned upon
-
Permalink Reply by Ivory on -
I'll have to look for it. I'll send the link to those curious if I find it, but I don't feel comfortable posting it. It is just sorta yuck.
-
Permalink Reply by Surro Mommy (Jenn) on -
hhhmm id also like to know the site address.....this ive got to see too!!!
-
Permalink Reply by Sara K-W on -
I've heard of stuff like this before....and I find that i'm greatly upset by the idea of it. i get that it's A LOT of changes to your body and your lifestyle, but if you aren't ready to take a little time away from your career, or to gain a few pounds then i'm not sure your ready to be a parent yet either.
I know this sounds harsh, but there are so many people out there that CAN'T have a baby naturally, and to choose surrogacy when you ARE capable of it seems shallow.
Maybe I should judge on a case by case basis, but after hearing so many peoples stories of failed pregnancies, and years of fertility treatments and finally seeking a surrogate, I can't condone Surrogacy as a weight management system or a career building opportunity.
-
Permalink Reply by Sarah B. on -
I do think an ethical line was crossed because this ad wasn't to help parents are medically unable to have kids but targeting those who would rather not be bothered with being pregnant. Thats disgusting. I am sure it is a slap in the face to most people when they read the above ad. Most people turn to surrogacy because they need help having a baby. I have run across some who are in it because it doesn't fit into their lives, being pregnant. They figured hiring someone would be easier. So if you don't have time or don't want to be bother being pregnant, how is raising a child any different? Is daycare or a nanny going to raise them then? Needless to say I didn't work with them, but you would be surprised how often it does come up. I personally think its so awful because I look at surrogacy as I am helping someone who is just not able to become pregnant. Having someone who is pregnant and who doesn't want to carry a pregnancy is totally defeating purpose of surrogacy. I honestly wonder these Hollywood types who hire surros to conserve their figure or if they do indeed really need one for medical reasons.
-
Permalink Reply by GinaF on -
I think some ethical lines might have been crossed. Keep in mind that I have no problem with people (surros) that are only doing this for money. If they are still going to do a good job of taking care of someone else's baby and follow doctors orders and the IPs have a baby in then end then so be it. With that said I agree that if someone just doesn't have the time or doesn't want to ruin their figure then I wouldn't want anything to do with them. However, I can think of an instance in which I might agree with someone that is capable of carrying their child using a surrogate. What if someone has the sort of job in which they don't want to quit or can't afford to. However, they are around hazzardous materieals all the time. Perhaps even despite being able to take precautions, they are just afraid of the potential risk. Even that circumstance is a bit of a stretch though.
-
Permalink Reply by jodi on -
"Genuine" I love how you pick and choose whether something is ethically correct or not..an olympic athlete really?!? You have no problem with someone carrying a child for someone who doesn't want to lose their figure or stop playing a sport but, you take issue with women "selling their souls" by legally entering into a compensated surrogacy? Weren't you just rambling earlier about women's rights? And setting ourselves backwards?
-
Permalink Reply by Sarah B. on
-
For every negative story in the TS world I am going to say.... It takes 1000 good stories for even the harsh memory to fade on the negative story. I realize that the Baby M case was a landmark case, it just gets old to hear about it. I think of a 100 good stories to tell but this case is still haunting the TS world.... urgh. *Rolleyes....* (not at you, at the case).
-
Permalink Reply by jodi on
-
"Genuine" don't even try to pretend we are "sisters." Sisters support each other, they do not insult each other as you continue to do to all of the members on this site. You think because you put this in a blog that noone is effected? Here is a bit of your blog to refresh your memory:
All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing" Edmund BurkeCompensated SM's and ED's are the root of all evil.....
" generally exploits women from lower socio- economic groups, who may be bullied into donating eggs for financial gain." Please, no one is forced to donate their eggs
" it only also direspects all those women who fought for women's freedom is this the future the feminist Emmeline Pankhurst fought for if we trade on one of fundatmental aspects of being female ,our wombs our eggs for financial gain, via paid surrogacy and egg selling" Again, insult those SM's, ED's and IP's who chose to pursue a compensated surrogacy we are somehow setting back women's rights.
" what expample our we setting our daughters" I showed my daughter that there are some mommies that have broken tummies and some other mommies want to help by carrying their babies for them.
" lets not take their money and provide reciepts for expenses, no I don't mean giving your Ip a reciept for a $600 dinner bill" Oh yeah, because we are reimbursed for expenses agreed upon by both parties SM and IP's, laid out in a contract,with specific dollar amounts, we will probably try to take our IP's for all we can!
-
Permalink Reply by jodi on
-
"Genuine"Funny you mention India because just a month or so ago you recommended that IP's pursue going there as a less expensive way to pursue their Journey....hmm contradict yourself much? Your Quote :
"Bonnie Trujillo, trust me I am with ya on this one, your the people I am talking about, but hey nobody wants to listen , I am glad God made me fertile because the fee on that site made me puke http://www.babystepping.com/estimated_expenses
sorry Jessica but it is alot of money, Good Luck Bonnie , seriously I mean it, Good Luck you ever thought about going to India, way cheaper."
I've never said anything about your face, only that I found it inappropiate that you use Mother Teresa as your profile pic, as far as your ideals, there is nothing wrong with having your own opinion,morals,or ideals I have a problem with you insulting IP's and SM's and ED's on a daily basis. And my names not Anne..As far as the rest of your post goes, I'm not really sure what you said..lost in translation I suppose.
Here is the link to the discussion I began after you mentioned India in a blog post awhile ago:
http://surrogatemother.com/forum/topics/surrogacy-in-india
-
Permalink Reply by lisa Bames on -
What does "oh massa" mean?
-
Permalink Reply by ProudScotsMumtoBe on -
Oh don't even GO there. You will have already ascertained the tenor of this thread from reading the various posts.
Since you are au fait with Google here's a link which will enlighten you without having to open up a whole can of worms on the site.
http://books.google.co.uk/books?id=M_YWAAAAYAAJ&pg=PA15&lpg...
© 2010 Created by Tracy.
